🌿 **How the Idea of “Normal” Was Created: A Therapist’s Reflection***(London & Online Therapy)*

There is a moment that happens quietly for many people.

A moment of comparison.

You notice how others seem to move through the world, and something in you asks, often without words:

Why does this feel harder for me?

Why don’t I feel… normal?

In my work as a therapist in London and through online therapy, this question appears often, especially for those who identify as neurodivergent or live with ADHD.

But what we rarely pause to ask is this:

Where did the idea of “normal” come from in the first place?

Before “normal” existed

There was a time when people were not measured against a single standard.

Across many ancient cultures, health was understood as a form of balance.

Not perfection, not uniformity, but a relationship between the individual and their environment.

Difference was not automatically seen as a problem.

It was simply part of human variation.

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The shift towards measurement

The idea of “normal” as we understand it today began to emerge much later, particularly in the 18th and 19th centuries.

This was a time of scientific measurement, classification, and growing industrial systems.

### An interesting fact

The word “normal” originally referred to something like a rule or a standard.

It did not mean “typical person” in the way we use it today.

That meaning developed alongside statistics.

The invention of the “average person”

In the 19th century, statisticians began studying large groups of people and calculating averages.

Height, weight, behaviour, intelligence.

From this, a concept emerged.

The “average person”.

### Another interesting fact

The average was never meant to describe a real individual.

It was a mathematical idea.

But over time, it became something more.

It quietly transformed into an ideal.

When average became “normal”

This is where the shift happened.

Average stopped being descriptive

and became prescriptive.

Instead of saying:

“This is what most people are like”

Society began to imply:

“This is what people should be like”

And anything outside of that began to be seen as deviation.

Industrialisation and the need for standardisation

At the same time, society was changing rapidly.

Factories, schedules, and systems required people to behave in consistent, predictable ways.

This meant valuing:

• focus and sustained attention

• physical and mental endurance

• repetition and routine

• efficiency and productivity

A key point

The concept of “normal” became closely tied to how well someone could function within these systems.

Those who did not fit were often labelled as less capable or in need of correction.

The impact on how we see the mind

Over time, this way of thinking extended to mental health and cognition.

Differences in attention, emotion, or behaviour were increasingly:

• measured

• classified

• diagnosed

This is where many modern ideas about “disorders” began to take shape.

Not purely from understanding,

but from comparison to a constructed norm.

ADHD, neurodiversity, and the limits of this model

For people with ADHD or other forms of neurodiversity, this history still matters.

Many traits associated with ADHD, such as:

• variable attention

• sensitivity to environment

• non-linear thinking

• need for movement or variation

are not inherently negative.

But they can become difficult in environments designed around a narrow definition of normal.

A different way of understanding difference

In more recent years, there has been a shift in perspective.

Instead of seeing difference purely as a problem within the individual,

there is growing recognition of the role of the environment.

This is sometimes described as a more relational way of understanding.

Difficulty is not just in the person.

It is in the interaction between the person and the world around them.

So what is “normal”, really?

When you step back, it becomes less solid.

Normal is not a fixed truth.

It is shaped by history, culture, and systems of value.

It changes over time.

And it has often been defined by those in positions of power.

Therapy and stepping outside the standard

Therapy can offer a space to begin questioning these inherited ideas.

Working with a therapist in London or online can help you:

• explore how ideas of normal have shaped your self-image

• understand your experiences in a wider context

• reduce self-criticism

• reconnect with your own way of being

Closing reflection

The idea of “normal” can feel deeply personal.

But it is not something you created.

It has been shaped over time, through systems that needed people to fit into certain ways of being.

If you have felt outside of it,

that may not be a sign that something is wrong.

It may be a sign that the definition itself is too narrow.

And that there is more than one way to be human.